Sneak peaked oops

 So I sneak peaked this morning to see how I did...plus I got up so many times to go to the loo it was unbelievable.  I went from yesterday being 164.7 to today being 162.8 I (1.9 kgs down) am sooo happy with that as I had been so good the last couple of days and tracking and doing what exercise I can. 

Today was moving things in my art room and two big cupboards from the garage to the Art Studio almost killed me as they were huge.  Hubby and I cleaned half the garage clean and tried to find places for our children's stuff as they can't have it where they live but want to keep it for when they move.

Then I vacuumed the whole house.  Went for a swim in our swim spa and I did 20 minutes kicking. 

Kept to my points did my 20 minutes exercise, cleaned, did art and now updating my blog.  

164.7 kilos - Last time I will see that

164.7 kilos is just terrible and I know it.

The highest weight I had been previously was 157.3 so I have gained all of it back and more. I went from 157.3 to 119.8 kgs and felt great and then life got in the way with kids and my mum getting older and sick and I just gave up on me.

When I lost my weight previously I was blogging and reading about other inspiring people and making sure by blogging I was keeping myself accountable.  I need to do that again and keep myself going.

Why do I find it so hard?  Why do I feel that having the food will make me happy and I should be able to have anything I want to eat and no one can be my boss.  What a stupid reaction.

I want to do so many things like:

• Tie my shoes
• Put my own socks on
• Sitting in the chairs at mums dementia home and fit in it.
• Breathing properly when I walk instead of heavy breathing
• Going for long walks with hubby and not being in pain
• Trying new walking tracks
• Ride my bike on bike tracks and feel great 
• Fit in my clothes
• Stop pulling my top down so I don't see my belly
• Wear a pretty dress and not be a tent
• Buy off the rack

We finally have time to do things my hubby and I and I want to not just sit watching tv or doing things sitting down. I want to experience life with my hubby

Weigh day is Sunday morning arghhhh

Wish me luck 
LL